I am in that place again. I feel as if I have almost had enough, enough of the pain, the grief, the tears, beating myself up for everything that you did, the lies and so many more. But then I teeter... I think of the pain it would bring, then the pain it would help put a stop too. I think of everything I would have to accept and deal with. I think about everything I would lose and miss out on. Then I think about all the things that you have forced me to miss out on. All because you love you more than you have loved others.
I am and having been trying to reach out for help, people say that they are there, that I can talk to them anytime. But I am not sure what to do with that since I know that when I talk about it too much, even if it is to different people every time, I always get a strong sense of guilt. Like I am burdening people with my problems, or that I will be seen as a whiner.
Outside of that I have SO many other things going on. It is overwhelming and I feel like I am getting buried in this crap. I feel like if anymore gets piled on top of me that I may never find my way out again. I don't know what to do anymore...
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